Robert Jones ‘Men and their Horses’

Man, sometimes you read about an actor’s band and you expect nothing and then something magical happens. I know that Billy Bob Thornton, Jeff Bridges, Russell Crowe and many other famous actors want to make you believe that it never will happen because all of their projects are horrible, but then there are Dead Man’s Bones and Phantom Planet, The Deadly Snakes and Warpaint – and yeah, I know, one should distinguish between actors who also do music and vice versa but heck, this introduction should only be the slow and gleaming intro to another musical epiphany no one would ever expect (or at least I never expected).

Remember “X Men: First Class”? Of course you do because this movie was the bomb and if you haven’t even seen it, please do so and come back later (alright, alright, stay and we’ll watch it together some other time, I don’t want to be too hard on you because I love you).

(I would always use this power to shut up people on concerts who scream louder than the singer on stage)

Well, remember the kid who played Banshee? The red-haired and luckily at that point already legal kid (because he is kinda hot, sorry, I will now continue the music related commentary) who despite internet comments does not look like Rupert Grint at all? I saw him in another movie (“The Last Exorcism” which I liked more than rotten tomatoes told me to, or rather the audience of rotten tomatoes) and thought I knew him from somewhere and then I Imdb’d the crap out of his name (nah, that just sounds wrong).

Well, that’s Caleb Landry Jones who is also – you guessed it – in a band! This band is called Robert Jones which consists of only two, maybe even three dudes (the other one being Robert Hudson if I am correct and there’s also AJ Durham on bass who you will see in the videos only if you squint and believe in him really hard) and Robert Jones raise freaking hell.

Seriously, when I read that Mr Jones played in some sort of psychedelic rock band, I imagined one of those suburban garage tryouts that makes Keanu Reeves’ band so incredibly unappealing but hell no, the first song of their album “Men and their Horses” starts with a scream and then heads off to a nightmarish, ruthless alternative scenario along the lines of 90s fuzz, The Black Angels, maybe some Kyuss desert sound doused in some classic 70s rock and a lot of the Doors and had me in utter disbelief that this was actually their debut, their freaking debut.

It’s absolutely mind-blowing and continues to be so throughout the whole album, so you need at least 13 minds to be blown, you better start collecting them right now.

You know when it’s proper psychedelic music? When you dive in with the first track and emerge after the last, feeling dizzy and confused. What I also love about their album? I will listen to it when I am out and about and I will feel like the most badass mother in the whole city because their sound has balls and everyone who listens will get those for free.

I am absolutely in love with this, it’s dirty, raw, energetic, humorous,  has a certain southern style to it (I think they’re from Texas but am not quite sure) and the guys create those eery soundscapes (“You too shall fall”) only to turn them into fun garage pieces that urge you to get drunk and do something stupid (“Smaller at the nose” is the song that the Strokes wanted to write last year but couldn’t because Robert Jones apparently have stolen their mojo). How the hell is that not all over the internet, in what a world do we live that an album as grand and beautiful as this (just listen to “Clinic” and you’ll melt into your seat) is not more known?

The best part? Their album is available for 5$ at bandcamp which is about 3.50€ – I buy frozen pizza that is more expensive and am not sure whether I should be happy for that bargain or angry at those guys because I definitely would have paid more if I had the chance. Those idealistic musicians are really a pain in the ass…

ONE other thing: Dudes need Facebook, I know that this album is from 2009 and that their myspace page was not completely outdated back in those olden days of myspace flash pages that took hours to load but I panic at the thought of them doing something together in the near future and I don’t know about it because it’s not in my Facebook feed and no, I will not go back to myspace because of one band not even this one (unless they write a song called “Jule come back to myspace, do it for us we don’t want to create a facebook page because it’s too much work!” then I just might).

Edit 14/03/12: So, as usual, I let my personal current favourites flow into my totally professionally written music blog at work, so now there’s a German review of the album. I hope, it doesn’t stay the only one, I know that music journalism is obsessed with the freshest music and the old classics and couldn’t give two flips about great, unknown bands from years ago but I have a dream…that one day people will not use a powerful message for equality as a lazy means of being not very funny.

Edit 08/04/12: They got a facebook page! Next on my wishlist: please provide unicorns for everyone who likes it (you know, you want to).


2 thoughts on “Robert Jones ‘Men and their Horses’

  1. Remember “X Men: First Class”?

    I actually haven’t seen it. I watched the first three (or was it two) parts, and when I heard that this one didn’t even have the one reason that kept those from being a complete waste of money (You guessed it: Rebecca Romjin. It always seemed kind of strange to me that nudity is such a problem in the US, but as soon as someone’s blue, it doesn’t matter anymore…), I didn’t bother buying a ticket.
    Maybe I’ll rent it one day.
    Anyway, his music is very nice, though not quite my cup of tea.


    1. To be honest with you, when it comes to X Men movies I might not be the best advisor because I just enjoy them no matter how silly they might be, I was a huge fan as a kid (I was on team wolverine but maybe only because I liked Thundercats as well). But I would say that it’s less absurd than the third movie (indeed, there were three) and Fassbender and Bacon alone make it worthwhile. Bacon is hilarious.
      Also – America is crazy when it comes to nudity. All facepalms of the internet couldn’t convey their crazy attitutde towards boobs and Co.


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